due chiacchiere

Occhio alla lingua

Per la lezione d’inglese di oggi, ho trovato un video dove un povero insegnante cerca di insegnare la lingua anglosassone ad una classe di persone provenienti da varie parti del mondo, incluso il tipico italiano con il suo modo di fare spavaldo. Si tratta di un siparietto estratto dalla sitcom inglese Mind your language andata in onda negli anni ’70, ma più che attuale ancora oggi. Per facilitare la comprensione, ho aggiunto la trascrizione sotto. Buona visione.

As you know, in a few weeks’ time you will all be taking your lower Cambridge, so tonight I thought I’d give you an oral examination. You are wanting to look at our tooths? Right, I mean that I gotta go around the class and ask you all to give me some answers and hope I get some correct ones. We are having a quiz! Yes! Oh like Mr. Mind? Mastermind! Yes, please. Actually, that’s not a bad idea. Let’s make it competitive. We’ll have a knockout competition. You mean like it a big punch up? Only verbally. I’ll go around the class and whoever fails to answer a question correctly drops out, all right? Now, where shall we start? Yes, I’ll give you an easy one to start with. Um, what is the plural of goose? Goose? Yes, one goose two … Gooses? She’s knocked out. No, the plural of goose is geese. Oh hu, geese. All right, we won’t count that, let’s have another one.

Let me see. What is the opposite of good. Not good. I would have preferred that you’d have said bad, but we’ll accept that. All right. Uh, Giovanni, what is an epistle? That’s easy! An epistle is the wife of an apostle! That’s you out. I’m not wrong! Yes, an epistle is a letter. Max, give you another word for forward. McDonald! McDonald? Yeah, he plays forward for Arsenal. I don’t mean that kind of forward, in other words, for moving forward. Advance? Advance, yes good, well done. Anna, another word for debunk. Debed! No no, it means to ridicule. Ali, correct the following sentence: last night I am going to the cinema. Last night I’m not going to the cinema. Wrong! It is not wrong, because last night I’m not going anywhere at all. You should have said: last night I went to the cinema. But I’m telling you, I didn’t went. It doesn’t matter whether you did or didn’t, you’re out.

Ranjeet, complete following proverb: a bird in the hand… Makes mess on your wrist! A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush. You’re out. Next, Danielle, explain the meaning of the word illiterate. That is someone whose parents are not married. Danielle, that’s illegitimate, sorry. Juan, give me the opposite of the following words, ready? Not ready. Yeah, I haven’t started. I started. [?] I lost. That’s enough. Hey, that’s not enough. Stop! Go. Sit down! Stand up. Oh somebody stop him, please! Silenzio. Hey I do good, uh? Yeah, it’s good. Yo soy un talento! All right, Taro, give me the following tenses of the verb to move. Past perfect, present perfect, past continuous. Say something, Taro. I’m out. All right, so who have we got left here? Well let’s see how many of you can survive another round.

Jamila, can you count up to ten? [?] Count up to ten, one two three… [speaks native language] I mean, in English. Wone, too, four. Three. Six. No! Sorry, Jamila. Max, give me another word and explain to me what is the meaning of syntax. The tax you pay when you go to the church? All right, sentence construction. Julie, spell democracy. C H I N A. I suppose if I’d asked you to spell out dictatorship, you would’ve spelled out England. Or America! All right, Juan, that leaves only you. If you can answer the next question correctly, you will be the brain of the class, which doesn’t say an awful lot for the rest of you. Por favor? Here is your question: what is another name for a valley between two mountains? Valley between two mountains. Si, yes. Pass. [laughs] I win! I am the big talento, the big brain. Yeah, because of your big head. Stop, stop please.

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